I was unaware of what it was like to have a “one-track mind” for the most of my life. I frequently wanted I could experience what it would be like to have one-sided focus, but the term has bad connotations and is typically associated with someone who only thinks about sex. even, no, particularly, on sex.
According to studies, there is a significant disparity between the clinical referrals for ADHD diagnosis for boys and girls, ranging from three to sixteen to one. I even discovered that the symptoms that I and other adult women with ADHD noticed weren’t often listed in the ADHD screening procedure. They were more interested in the normal signs and symptoms that boys and men exhibit. Knowing that I had options for treatment and that I wasn’t alone in experiencing these obstacles to living a full life brought me relief after receiving my formal diagnosis.
I was never able to “simply let go” during sex before receiving medication for ADHD.
I felt so excluded from this fantasy of being completely present during sex, which other people had talked about in novels, movies, and casual conversations. I’ve always enjoyed having sex, but I thought I could be having more fun. I would make every effort to be totally present, to just enjoy the pleasure and take my time, but I would feel bad when, eventually, my mind would wander. I worried that my partner would notice the distraction on my face and feel unwelcome.
Contrary to popular belief, I frequently felt stressed out by having sex. Instead of enjoying myself in the moment, I would want to rush to finish it so I could check on whatever was causing my anxiety. I would worry about whether I had switched off the kettle, canceled a free trial subscription, or responded to an email.
I had no idea that my anxiety, which affected every area of my daily life, was a major element in the unpleasant thoughts that kept me from fully enjoying the act of having sex. Anxiety is a frequent adverse effect of ADHD. In fact, my psychologist sought to treat my anxiousness at first, but after conducting my own research, I was certain that my ADHD was to blame. Instead, he consented to try treating my ADHD. A few weeks later, when we checked in, he acknowledged that he ought to have trusted me right away and expressed his gratitude that I was able to speak up for myself.
I could never get my mind to stop racing since I had undiagnosed ADHD. Even when I was seeing my therapist, I would feel embarrassed because I would be trying so hard to just listen to her, but instead, my thoughts would be racing off in all directions and my focus would be nonexistent. I didn’t know what to anticipate when I took my prescription medication for the first time. My thoughts was peaceful as I was doing the dishes when it dawned on me. For the first time in years, I was free of my distracting thoughts so that I could concentrate solely on the task at hand. It was such a liberating experience. I was present-focused. I believe that was the first time in my life that doing the dishes made me joyful.
Sex improved greatly once I began treatment and was finally able to calm my thoughts. My intrusive thoughts could no longer trouble me. Finally, I was just there in my body, only thinking about how much pleasure I and my companion were having and what position we should try next. I began initiating impromptu mid-day romps, which was uncharacteristic of me because I’d always preferred to have sex at night when I felt like I had less to worry about.
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