Cry is one of the most effective ways to relieve tension, irritation, or anxiety. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that; everyone needs to let it out occasionally. It might even be beneficial for you. However, there are instances when you are prepared with a box of tissues but the tears just won’t flow. You might want to learn how to cry at these moments because it’s so crucial to allow yourself to.
According to Midwest Counseling’s Olga Karasina, PsyD, crying might help you break free from the stress cycle and let out stress. She continues, “Not letting go of strong emotions is like attempting to hold a beach ball under water; it is draining and eventually will rise up in a much more unpredictable and unwanted manner.
According to Karasina, crying can also be a self-soothing technique that helps us let go of pent-up emotions that are now taking up space and probably affecting us without any release.
Why then do some people find it difficult to cry?
Sometimes medical concerns like dry eye syndrome, when an insufficient amount of tears are generated, and Sjögren’s syndrome, an inflammatory disease characterized by dry eyes and mouth, can make it difficult for you to shed tears. Some pharmaceuticals can have a similar effect, including antidepressants, antihistamines, birth control, and blood pressure meds. Contrary to popular belief, those who are depressed might not feel like crying even if the need arises. You might also be unable to do so because you are trying to avoid it; you might be trying to stifle unpleasant emotions and ideas.
If you really need the release but can’t seem to make it happen, here are a few methods from professionals to get the waterworks rolling.
1. Avoid Blinking
One of the easiest ways to make yourself cry is simply not blinking. “Your body’s natural impulse is to blink to produce moisture and prevent any debris and dirt from staying and risk triggering an infection,” says Lena Suarez-Angelino, LCSW, of Choosing Therapy. “When you go against nature, your body will strive to do everything in its power to recalibrate.”
Try looking at a blank wall for 20 to 30 seconds, or as long as you can stand. Your eyes will most likely start to burn and a tear or two may fall. If you do that *and* think about anything that made you feel wounded or sad, then put on a sad song, you can most certainly start crying.
2. Engage In Breathwork
“Breathwork activates your parasympathetic nervous system and helps to bring you back into balance emotionally, psychologically, physically, and spiritually,” explains Suarez-Angelino. “Many people indicate they have sobbed, along with other healing experiences, as a result of breathwork sessions.”
If you’re new to this practice, attempt the approaches on a weekly basis and provide space for yourself to implement and process the healing that may come up during these sessions.
3. Go For A Walk
Walking on a daily basis is useful for several reasons, but heading outside, especially without any interruptions, helps you to go inner and contemplate. “Reflect on things you believe you have been ignoring or sweeping under the rug. Allow them to surface and tune into your sensations and ideas regarding these situations,” advises Suarez-Angelino.
4. Listen To Music
Music is a terrific way for people to delve into their emotions. Karasina recommends putting on a music of your choice and thinking about a time that brings up feelings for you personally.
She also recommends coupling this with another activity like spending time in nature or performing yoga in your favorite outdoor area where you feel comfortable and safe. This combo may help you connect with yourself and offer you the opportunity to fully embrace your feelings in the moment.
5. Move Your Body
Working out and getting your body moving can also help shuffle any stagnant energy throughout your body to facilitate an emotional release.
“Certain poses in yoga are known to help heal trauma and process emotions, which often results in tears,” says Suarez-Angelino. “Sometimes a vigorous workout that involves hitting or punching, such as kickboxing or regular boxing can help get out some of the frustration you are experiencing, which helps break down the barrier and allow tears to flow.”
Depending on how often you exercise and the amount of pent-up emotions and tension you have, you may find yourself crying rather often initially and then less over time.
6. Read A Sad Story
Similar to listening to music, reading something sad can help bring on the tears. “Some book titles are notorious for having people repeatedly cry time and time again, regardless of the number of times they have read them,” says Suarez-Angelino.
If you think you need some practice with this method, she recommends trying it once a month, or if you feel like you need to cry more often, once a week.
7. Take A Shower
Some people need privacy to have a good cry or don’t like the feeling of tears rolling down their cheeks. If that is the case for you, try taking a shower. “Try taking a shower and use your senses to muffle the outward sounds of crying while also being able to blend the water on your face with the tears streaming down,” says Suarez-Angelino.
However, she cautions not to take too much time trying to turn on the waterworks. “You could try this every time you are in the shower for no longer than about five minutes, so as to not waste any water,” she says.
8. Talk To Someone
If you are having a hard time getting in touch with your emotions, Karasina recommends opening up and sharing your feelings with someone you trust like a family member, good friend, or partner. “A therapy session or good vulnerable talk with someone you trust can sometimes bring about feelings and allow us to have a good cry,” she adds.
She even suggests looking into group therapy or an online support group, which may offer another space to feel safe and supported to share and have the experience of crying surrounded by people who can hold space for and support this expression.
9. Write It Out
If you are upset and want to cry it out, Suarez-Angelino recommends taking out some paper and pen and composing a letter to the person or situation that is troubling you. “Sometimes being able to write down your feelings and thoughts helps your emotions rise to the surface and make themselves known,” she explains.
It is not intended to be mailed or seen to whoever is engaged in the problem, but rather to allow for expression without judgment. “When you are graced with this space, the tears are more likely to come,” explains Suarez-Angelino.
10. Yawn
Another simple approach to help get the tears flowing is by yawning. “Try yawning a few times in a row to wake up the tear ducts. This may be useful to get your body to cry,” adds Suarez-Angelino, but remember that this strategy may not work for everyone.
The good news is yawning does not cause any harm if you do it too much. However, forced yawning can quickly turn into actual yawning and you may start to feel fatigued or sleepy.
When trying to make yourself cry, the most crucial thing is to not feel any pressure to cry. “Let go of the expectation that you need to have tears in order to feel. The instant you let go of the pressure of forcing yourself to have tears, you are able to take a breath and start to analyze your emotions,” explains Suarez-Angelino.
Also Read ABout A Complete Guide To Shadow Work, Plus Why It’s Good For Your Mental Health